Redneck Recipes

Last night Greg and I went out to dinner. There were two redneck guys behind us drinking beer and eating pizza. I was trying not to listen to their conversation, but I could not help but hear everything they were saying because they were talking so loud. The conversation got to leftover pizza:

Redneck 1: "You know what I see when I look at that?" (pointing to the pizza)
Redneck 2: "Uh....Pizza...?"
RN1: "Nope. I see 4 different kind of meals"
RN2: *confused*
RN1: "I can make omelets out of pizza the next day"
RN2 *more confused* (so was I)
RN1: "And you ever had sloppy joes?"
RN2: "Yeah"
RN1: "Well I make this thing out of a can of sloppy joe mix and pizza. Some of the best shit you'll ever eat. It's like gourmet"

I must say, I was pretty curious about the pizza omelet and the....sloppy joe "thing". Not curious because I'd want to try either of them, but because I am amazed at what people will eat. Ah, but it didn't stop there. He also makes pizza goulash and day old pizza garlic bread! Lucky for you folks, he rattled off the recipes so I'm sharing them with you so you can taste these gourmet delights yourself!

Pizza Omelet

Remove pizza topping from crust. Make omelet and stuff with pizza toppings.

Enjoy!

Sloppy Joe Pizza Thing

Split some hoagie rolls, pour a can of sloppy joe mix over them, peel off pizza topping from pizza crust and lay over sloppy joe drenched hoagie rolls. Broil until "bubblin' and gooey".

Enjoy!

Pizza Goulash

Again, remove pizza topping from crust (he's not a big crust person.....well, at least not pizza crust). Put pizza topping in a pan and heat until all "bubblin' and gooey".

Enjoy!

Day Old Pizza Garlic Bread

I'm going to give you this recipe just like he explained it:

"Go to the store and ask for the day old (he called it 24 hour old) garlic bread loaf they make there in the store. They'll sell it to ya for .75 cents because it's old. Scrape off the cheese and everything from the crust and put it on the garlic bread. Put it in the oven for.....oh, 20 minutes, and I tell you what man, that's some good shit".

Enjoy!

Name That Tune

Selected lyrics are posted below. Just a few of my most favorite. They are all on my iPod.

DO NOT CHEAT AND LOOK THEM UP.

Try to name as many as you can.

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#1
How long...
How long must we sing this song?
How long? how long...

#2
you don't know me, you don't even care,
you don't know me, you don't wear my chains...

#3
I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20

#4
When he first came to the mountains his life was far away
On the road and hangin' by a song
But the string's already broken and he doesn't really care
It keeps changin' fast and it don't last for long

#5
Like a song of love that clings to me
How the thought of you does things to me
Never before has someone been more

#6
All day
Staring at the ceiling
Makin' friends with shadows on my wall

#7
all of the things that I want to say
just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping inwards
you got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

#8
But there never seems to be enough time
To do the things you want to do
Once you find them
Ive looked around enough to know
That youre the one I want to go
Through time with

#9
and so you're back
from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face

#10
When Im with you
I shake inside
My hearts all tangled up
My tongue is tied its crazy

#11
Gonna wrap my arms around you
Hold you close to me
Oh, babe, I wanna taste your lips
I wanna fill your fantasy, yeah

#12
Why cant you see
What youre doing to me
When you dont believe a word I say?

#13
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I

#14
Nobody said it was easy
It’s such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Aww take me back to the start

#15
You see it all around you
Good lovin' gone bad
And usually it's too late when you, realize what you had

this and that

Update on Michael Vick

The video is hard to watch because his teammate is an idiot...in my opinion.

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This morning I've been listening to John Cougar Mellencamp's "Scarecrow" CD. Shoots me right back to the 80's. Good times.

"Days turn to minutes and minutes to memories
Life sweeps away the dreams that we have planned
You are young and you are the future
So suck it up and tough it out
And be the best you can"
~Minutes To Memories, John Cougar Mellencamp

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Crispy Smoked Mozzarella with Honey and Figs

Before you say ick, just try it with the honey and figs!

6 sheets phyllo dough
6 ounces smoked mozzarella, cut into 6 equal pieces
Vegetable oil, for frying
8 ounces dried figs, stemmed and quartered
3/4 cup honey, plus more for drizzling
3 teaspoons black sesame seeds
In a large pot, heat the vegetable oil over medium heat to 350 degrees F.
Place 1 sheet of phyllo on a dry work surface. Place one slice of cheese about 5 inches from the top of the narrow end of the sheet. Fold the top of the narrow end over the cheese, leaving 1 inch between the fold and the cheese. Next fold over 1 of the long sides then the other, again leaving 1-inch between the folds and the cheese. Then fold the cheese over, again leaving 1-inch between the fold and the cheese. Continue folding to make a package about 3 1/2 by 4-inches. Continue with the remaining pieces of cheese and phyllo.

Fry the phyllo and cheese packages, 2 or 3 at a time, in the oil until golden, about 2 minutes per side. Drain on a baking sheet lined with paper towels.

Meanwhile, heat the figs and honey in a small saucepan over low heat until the honey is warm. Set aside until the cheese packages have finished frying.

To serve, place 1 cheese package on a plate. Spoon some figs and drizzle some honey over the top of each cheese package. Sprinkle with black sesame seeds and serve immediately.

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Have a lovely weekend.

Today has been hard. Sometimes I just don't know how I keep coming back to work day after day.

My vacation is in November. That seems like a very long time from now. Somehow I need to try and get thru these next few months and not let it get me so down, but it's hard.

Astrological Signs And Car Crashes

ARIES-You are at fault 6.6% off the time. You are most likely to crash between the hours of 11am and 5pm.

TAURUS-You are responsible for 6.2% of crashes. Be cautious driving in the dark.

GEMINI-You cause 9.3% of crashes. You are most likely an over-aggressive driver and like to cut other drivers off.

CANCER-You cause 8.8% of accidents...most often at intersections.

LEO-You cause 7.4% of crashes...and most of them are rear-enders on a straight road.

VIRGO-10.7% of car crashes are your fault. You have tendency to speed.

LIBRA-You are the cause of 6.1% of all car crashes. You are the lowest of all the astrological signs. Call your insurance company for a discount.

SCORPIO-Your sign results in causing 6.8% of crashes most of which are head-on collisions on straight roads. So, be careful when passing.

SAGITTARIUS-Watch out, you cause 6.8% of all car crashes. These are usually broadside collisions at intersections.

PISCES-Responsible for 8.4% of crashes usually because you are not paying attention when you should be.

CAPRICORN-You cause 13%...you are the most crash prone driver in the zodiac. You tend to ignore traffic signs and tend to do "your own thing."

AQUARIUS-This sign is involved with 9.9% of mishaps. Most collisions are involved with smaller vehicles...so you might want to drive a "land yacht."

~~~
I'm a Libra ~ we rock :)

On my recent adventure...

Back when Ina Garten was dating her husband and he was away at collage, she would send him these brownies. She says it was the culinary equivalent to a low cut dress. it worked....they have been married for 40 years!

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Peanut Swirl Brownies

1 pound unsalted butter
1 pound plus 12 ounces semisweet chocolate chips, divided
6 ounces unsweetened chocolate
6 extra-large eggs
3 tablespoons instant coffee granules
2 tablespoons pure vanilla extract
2 1/4 cups sugar
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour, divided*
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon kosher salt
3/4 cup smooth peanut butter

*Does not seem like enough, but it is.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Butter and flour a 12 by 18 by 1 1/2-inch sheet pan.
Melt together the butter, 1 pound of chocolate chips, and the unsweetened chocolate in a medium bowl over simmering water. Allow to cool slightly. In a large bowl, stir (do not beat) together the eggs, coffee granules, vanilla, and sugar. Stir the warm chocolate mixture into the egg mixture and allow to cool to room temperature.

In a medium bowl, sift together 1 cup of flour, the baking powder, and salt. Add to the cooled chocolate mixture. Toss the remaining 12 ounces of chocolate chips in a medium bowl with 1/4 cup of flour, then add them to the chocolate batter. Pour into the prepared sheet pan. Spoon the peanut butter over the top of the chocolate mixture and using a knife, swirl it through the chocolate mixture.

Bake for 20 minutes, then rap the baking sheet against the oven rack to force the air to escape from between the pan and the brownie dough. Bake for about 10 to 15 minutes more or until a toothpick comes out clean. Do not overbake! Allow to cool thoroughly, and cut into large squares.

The Kiss Mistery Solved

See the story and the interview here.

Talk Dirty To Me, Baby

This dedication goes out to my best friend Laura. As soon as I heard this song, I just thought of us. Hot young things running around the city. She's the one I loved to get into trouble with ~ taught me everything I know! Love you. ;-x

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You know I never, I've never seen you look so good
You never act the way you should
But I like it...
And I know you like it too
The way that I want you
I've gotta have you
Oh yes I do
I never, I never ever stay out late
You know that I can hardly wait
Just to see you
And I know you cannot wait
Wait to see me too
I've got to touch you
Cause baby we'll be

At the drive in
In the old man's Ford
Behind the bushes
Til I'm screamin' for more
Down in the basement
Lock the cellar door
And baby...
Talk dirty to me!
You know I call you, I call you on the telephone
I'm only hopin' that you're home
So I can hear you
When you say those words to me
And whisper so softly
I've gotta hear you
Cause baby we'll be
At the drive in
In the old man's Ford
Behind the bushes
Til I'm screamin' for more
Down in the basement
Lock the cellar door
Talk dirty to me!

C.C. Pick a bad guitar, and-a-talk to me, yeah!

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Cause baby we'll be..

At the drive in
In the old man's Ford
Behind them, bushes
Til I'm screamin' for more, more, more!
Down in the basement
And lock the cellar door
And baby, talk dirty to me, yeahhh
And baby, talk dirty to me......yeah yeah yeah
And baby...
Talk dirty to me

Uh!
Whoo!
That's the way I like it, baby
Ooh, yeah

~Talk Dirty To Me, Poison

With the exception of the fact I have blonde hair and my kitchen is not that hideous, The Simpsons version of me is kinda accurate.

Me Simpsonized

Simpsonize Yourself

Weekend Report

I went to the movies with my Mom on Saturday. It's a long story, but she found out I was interested in seeing "Rattatoulli" and has been inviting me to go with her and my nephews for the past 4 weekends. I've had other things to do (I might have lied a little bit about having other things to do) so she kept putting off seeing that movie on the off chance I'd be free another weekend. I went Saturday I went since I was running out of things I had to be doing every weekend. They were going to the 11:20am showing and she told me to be at her house at 9:30am.

9:30am?

Yeah, 9:30am. It takes her 2 hours to get the kids and get to the theater but it only takes me 45 minutes if I'm driving. So what are do they do for the other 1 hour 20 minutes?

"If we're early, we go to the .99 cent store" she tells me.

Hummm.

I offer to drive thinking this will fix me not having to be at her house so dang early....but she still thinks leaving at 9:30am is still necessary. Okay, fine....I didn't want to aruge with her.

So 45 minutes later we are browsing the .99 cent store....

It was a long day. But I think it is really sweet that she takes the nephews to the movies. She buys them whatever snacks they want and let's them run around inside the theater like wild monkeys until the lights go down. And they are good kids. Even tho they are were running around the theater, they were not screaming or being totally obnoxious. She even let's them sit anywhere they want. I looked over at her when they took their sets and asked her if they were just sitting by themselves because I was there or do they always do that?

"No, they always sit by themselves. I understand they don't want to sit with an old woman" she said.

That made me sad. And I started feeling really bad about not going with her to the movie sooner. She usually has zero interest in seeing the movies they want to see, but she takes them no matter what the movie is because it's their fun time. After the movie she gives them money and they play video games in the arcade. She makes it all about them even though she is tired and would rather be napping. Then they go home and she feeds them and they run around like wild monkeys until dinner. Then at 6pm she takes them back to their Dad.

What I got out of this was perspective. If you can read between the lines, you understand what I mean when I say that.

Me in my new cube

Wanna Make A Memory?

I am in love with this song. The lyrics get me right in the heart. And those first few taps on the panio a minute or so into the song....man. I just love it. And he sings it so well. The YouTube video is at the bottom. Pretty good video, too.