Hi Everyone....been away for a few days. Been busy at work. Some of you have been curious how things are going. On one hand, things are better but then on the other, things are not so good.

The new techy woman they hired is a nice person. So that's a good thing. I think a lot of people expected me to just hate her and not be nice to her because of the whole situation, but I had no plans of doing that. She came into this without any knowledge of what was going on and it would be unfair to blame her. I never intended on treating her poorly. That's not who/how I am. So you could say we've sort of become friends. We work in close quarters so we talk and are nice to each other.

But she's started asking questions.

Stuff like why would she have been asked in her interview if she has ever trained people. Of course I know the answer to that, but I just shrugged and acted like I didn't know. Then some advanced tasks came in and my boss usually takes care of, but they trained her to process them. She was confused why she was being trained and not me.

So I told her...just came out with it....."You're the one they are training to fill in when our boss is out on maternity leave".

This was the first she'd heard of it, but she seems up for the challenge. She did ask why I wasn't the one who would be filling in, and all I could really say was I'm not as technically advanced as she is.

It was hard to say that, but it's the truth. And it still hurts that they are training her and leaving me out of things. I know she can see it, but I try hard not to say very much about how I feel because it might make her feel guilty...and of course that isn't fair to her. So I just try and deal with it privately. It's hard sometimes....like today. No real reason, some days it gets into my head more than other days. I try to tell myself the work I do is important and even tho I'm not the one moving up the ladder, I'm still important and valued. Thing is, I need to believe that. Still having some trouble with that part.

Maybe someday.